Friday, April 5, 2013

Rest in peace, Stinimini.

It was hard choosing a photo of this girl. But I like this one, because it kind of shows what she was to me. She was my number one fan! haha. In that sense, that she always supported me in everything I did. She always showed her admiration and love every chance she got. I was lucky to have been her best friend for 12 years and continuously recieving her support in everything I pursued. Whenever I was in doubt or needed a little extra push she would always say "You're stiniwini, queen of fucking everything!" and thats exactly the way she made me feel when I was with her. We were best friends from the second we met, mostly because we shared the same name. Just arriving in Sweden and being a little innocent girl from Malaysia she walked up to me and asked for my name and said "My name is Stina too! You can sleep at my house tonight if you want?" and from that, we were best friends and have been ever since. She has been through everything and always managed to laugh at all kinds of situations with me. She never judged a soul and always said "Never judge someone because they sin differently than you.", that was her in a nutshell. I have had contact with her everyday  since I have been abroad and was even lucky enough to talk to her the day before she passed. I will never find words to describe the emptiness and the heartache I feel when I think of the times you won't be there. We were supposed to get married, and be on the Bridezilla show. I was going to be the godmother to her children in 20 years when she finally decides to have them. She was going to get my tattoo with me. We were getting our drivers licenses camp together this summer with the rest of Sweden's 18 year olds. We were going to go to spain in beginning of May. There is so much that we were going to do, and now nothing of these things will be the same without you. Nothing will ever replace the love and happiness that you gave me everyday. Nothing will ever be the same and you will forever and always be missed with your enormous kind heart.
 Like the quote above, thank you for teaching me what real friendship is. I hope that I will manage to be as encouraging and engaged in all my friend's lives as you were. You amazingly beautiful girl, thank you for every laugher and smile you ever given me. You are probably one of the people that have been the best at that. Damn you Stini and your enormous heart of gold, I will never find a friend like you again. You're irreplaceable.

Always and forever, you'll be my only Stinimini.