Thursday, October 4, 2012


The other night I had an experience with a taxi driver as I was coming home late from a friend's place. He said to me "You have a smile brighter than any sun, but you have such terrible pain in your eyes. You can't fool anyone with them!" I was surprised and astonished for someone to be so forward with me and especially in Sweden. I looked at him and said "Well, what do you know about pain?" and he answered "Not much, but I know what a lost soul looks like." I had nothing to say, i just smiled at him. When we reached my place he said to me "What is your name?" I said "Stina" He smiled at me and said "Stina, you should be happy that you are so young and lost." I gave him a confused look and he said "Because it is not until we are fully lost, that we really find ourselves. If never lost, you are really never anything, at least not what you fully can be."
I paid him for the ride and as I was jumping out he said "You are full of good karma. Good things are about to happen and your eyes will smile again. Good luck Stina"
And ever since then I have been thinking about this man and what he said.
I think I have been complaining alot lately on being a lost soul, but after my little taxi fair that I realized what an opportunity it is. And maybe the cliché saying "Life isn't about finding yourself, it is about creating yourself" actually is right. I think people stress alot all the time focusing on trying to find their way in this world, and trying to be someone that you are not capable of right now won't help you get there faster... I think you sort of just have to walk different paths to learn which paths gets you home first.
I think everyone is scared of being lost.
But it is a part of life and hopefully everyone goes through it, at least ones.
It is nothing to be ashamed of. It doesn't mean you are depressed or suicidal, it just means that maybe certain events have happened that have changed your living a little and it is just taking some time for you to figure out how to live in a new way.
So if you feel that you can  relate to this post, don't see this time in your life as something negative, see it as an opportunity to become whatever it is you want to become.